Trying Silks
Earlier this year (pre-covid19), I decided to try the other apparatuses because I was curious what they were like. It challenged me physcally as well as allowed me to try something new in addition to pole. The particular apparatus I wanted to try first was the silks. The silks were one of the ones that I wanted to try the most as I had seen folks on them practically everywhere. I had a few friends who took a silks class while we were in college and they had said that it took a lot of strength and was kinda hard, but was overall fun. Safe to say I had loads of fun in the class. I was a little nervous at first because I wasn’t sure what it was going to be like, but at the same time I was excited to try the silks. I didn’t really realize it, but wow did it take a lot of strength in my hands and core, and overall body coordination. It was a little uncomfortable when it came to wrapping the legs, but you get used it. I enjoyed getting to do the different poses/positions, and found that getting into them was pretty interesting. Hanging out in the poses was pretty fun as well as relaxing, and entertaining for myself. I don’t think I realized how much of an affect it can have on your hands as well as your whole body. My hands got worked pretty good as well as a little red due to not being used to holding on to the fabric, but it wasn’t that bad. I am glad I got to experience what being on silks was like and try them out, as they were a lot of fun. I would for sure recommend them for anyone on the fence about it as it is usually a good policy to try most things at least once to see how you feel about it. Maybe down the road I will try them again.
The Show Must Go On!
The Eleventh Annual Aerial Dance Holiday Show will soon be upon us! I have to be honest here, I wasn’t sure this one was going to happen. I don’t think any of us were. I know I’m preaching to the choir, but wow. It’s been weird. No one can be sure that their best laid plans will come to fruition anymore (my condolences to everyone who booked wedding venues), and making plans for something as ambitious as an aerial show is an intimidating task even for pre-covid times. The rigging, the scheduling, the cost, the TIME contributed to our shows is horrifying to me personally. I love all of you, but I would not do this for you. I would drive all of you to Mexico so you could get a cheap nose job. I would bail all of you out of jail. I would hide your illegal herd of alpacas on some undisclosed properties I have access to until your paperwork comes through. But I would not have invested in a showcase this year. The risk of cancellation would be too great for me, and I would have thrown in the towel and waited for smoother sailing. Paula, however, is a “big picture” person. She’s a good organizer, but she also knows how valuable this type of endeavor can be to a community. A reason to set a goal, something to be excited about, and most of all, a reason to celebrate each other. We always are doing our best to put everyone’s safety as our number one priority (although we are usually worried about rigging and making sure our dancers feel safe, informed, and comfortable, this whole COVID thing has just given us another thing to worry about) and unfortunately, this will strain profits for the show. We were truly worried how everything would affect our security and the safety of our students. And now the time is near at hand! I just want to say (and I think I speak for all of the instructors) that I appreciate everyone’s enthusiasm and support for this. The amount of women performing is extraordinary and I’m very excited to see what everyone has put together! It is truly difficult times for a small business like ours, and I feel a little dramatic right now, but I don’t know what I would do without all of you! Honestly, I was less than enthused to do a routine this year because I felt as though I’ve stagnated in my skills. I’m not mad about this, it’s to be expected! We have all lived through some traumatic times together, even though it feels very abstract and dramatic to say this at the moment. It’s ok to have halted some of your training for a bit, and we’re all playing catch up as a result. But that doesn’t mean that we can’t have fun and celebrate together! I hope that all of our performers are proud of themselves for agreeing to bring us all some much needed distraction and amusement; because I think we all could use some of that right now. I’m a little bummed that Chrissy and my performance is the last one of the day, because this really cuts into my drinking time, but at least I can watch all of you with my senses unencumbered. Keep practicing and remember to smile! We all appreciate you ladies for giving us a reason to keep being better versions of ourselves and reminding us how special our business is. I would be fused to my couch by now without you!
Political differences doesn’t have to mean HATE.
At Aerial Dance we actively try NOT to talk about politics. No joke, it is in our employee handbook to steer conversations AWAY from political, religious and controversial topics because our mission is to be an inclusive safe space for ALL women. That is more and more important as the country becomes more and more polarized. So to keep this blog from violating our policies, I won’t be identifying which party was which but will be talking about behavior and what we can choose instead of hate. My parents live in a standard middle class Northeast Wisconsin neighborhood. They know their neighbors and everyone helps each other out when there is a snow storm or wheels in your garbage cans if you’re away. In the past few months many neighbors have put up political signs supporting a presidential candidate. I have to admit I was surprised to see how clear most of the neighborhood was on one side of political divide. My parents don’t support that candidate. And in an action totally uncharacteristic of my father, who is a chameleon and avoids conflict, he put up a sign in their yard supporting the other candidate. This America, we should be able to support whomever and have positive healthy discussion….right? Directly after putting it up, the new neighbor next door walked over and said “you’re on the wrong side.” Woah. Like dude, the stakes aren’t even in the ground yet. My dad made a “well see” non-committal comment but was surprised at this reaction. We’re all American. Like aren’t we all hoping for what is best for the country and trying our best to make the country better? Shouldn’t the differences cause interesting conversations that helps us grow, learn and come together? Fast forward two weeks, my 73 year old mother is walking to the mailbox and this neighbor’s three kids (ages 3, 5, 7 ish) are outside on their bikes. The oldest yells over “{name of Political party of sign in her yard} Lady” (think Republican Lady or Democrat Lady). My mom is kinda shocked but responds “actually call me science lady, that’s what I am”. And he responds “I’ll call you fat lady.” My mom didn’t respond because she was so taken aback. She calls me and is upset. I tell her that our best response is kindness. That it is our job as a society to kindly correct name calling and political division with kindness. Later that day I go over to bring my mom dinner, park my car in the driveway and the three kids are out in the driveway on their bikes. I wave and say “hi kids” like I always do. They have seen me wave and say hi to them a million times in the year they have been my parents neighbors. The oldest says “{political candidates name on sign} girl” (think Trump girl or Biden girl). I said “what” sure I didn’t hear him correct, heck, I don’t live in that house. He says “{political candidates name on sign} girl”, again. Nope, I heard him right. I said, “you know I am actually conflicted about politics at the moment. And you know what is better than talking about politics? Being kind. Let’s practice kindness today”. And I was shocked at how much that interaction upset me. Since these interaction, the kids seem scared of me and my mom. Which makes zero sense. When I say “hi” they ignore me. Ok, cool, I will continue to wave and say hi every time. Because this is kindness and I want to live in a kind country no matter who the President is. We are ALL leaders and it is our daily actions that will dictate what type of country we live in. Since when as a country did a difference of opinion over a yard sign mean name calling and being disrespectful to elders? What happens to our country when the children who are being taught that a difference of political opinion allows them a negative hateful reaction are the adults? I beg all of you with children in your houses to teach them this election season that we are all American. To teach them that when someone has a different view, instead of looking for differences look for what makes you similar. To teach them that when someone has a different view to be kind to them because kind needs to always win over hate. We can’t teach hate to our children and expect this country to be a positive place in our future. The next few days are going to be hard. One candidate will win, one won’t. Either way, we are all still American and have the option to be sad, lick our wounds, and then come together as citizens to create the future we want. The power isn’t actually with the President. The power to create an amazing country lies within each and every one of us and the way we handle our day to day actions. I beg you to always choose kindness. This song is so spot on and ahead of it’s time. We have to be taught to hate. Love is innate. Let’s all choose love.
I get by with a little help from my Aerial Dance Sisters
Last weekend, I got into a screaming war with the guy that I had been seeing for the past few months. I thought that it was only a fight. I intended to give him some space and to talk to him at work on Saturday when he would be sober. He deleted me off of Facebook. We were evidently done. My initial instinct was to send him a text and be like “seriously?!?!” After talking to some of my Aerial/Pole sisters via text and Snap Chat, I decided not to react thanks to their good advice. It was apparent that he was trying to get a rise out of me. By reacting to him, I would be letting him win. I was also given the good advice of avoiding places e would be for the next few weeks. Before going to the studio one day, I was angry, crying, and upset. I was quiet while at the studio and going through the motions. For those that know me, I am definitely not quiet and I tend to make my presence known. After class, Instructor Olivia asked how I was doing. I told her what happened last weekend. In talking to Instructor Olivia, I realized that this was for the best. However, that doesn’t make things any easier. He was supposed to be my date for an Aerial/Pole sister’s wedding. It’s probably safe to say that he will not be accompanying me. After seeing the behavior that he exhibited on multiple occasions while intoxicated, that is probably a good thing. My “Little Buddy” at the studio offered to take his place as I had already sent in my RSVP that I was bringing a plus one. Aerial Dance isn’t only a place to work out at and learn cool tricks. It’s also a place of friendship and sisterhood. Besides my small core group of friends, the Aerial/Pole sisters are my people. The studio is a place where I can actually be myself and discuss what is going on in my life. My life has been a mess lately where I don’t know how I would be getting by without the studio and Aerial/Pole sisters in my life.
I Can’t Do That… YET!
While we were at instructor training the other day (yes, your instructors go to class too!), I was trying a new move that was fairly outside of my wheelhouse and Paula commented that she was surprised I had tried it out. At first, my instinct was to be mad and wonder why that was surprising, and then I realized two things. 1. Paula was saying that to express her pride in me. 2. She had every right to be surprised because a former me would not have attempted the trick. Despite the fact that I hang upside down on a metal object by my skin for fun, in general I am not a very adventurous person. I like to play things safe and approach life with caution. When I first became an instructor, there were times where I would watch my fellow instructors perform or break down more advanced tricks, but not necessarily try them myself. While, an attempt was always encouraged, and spots were always provided for safety, I told myself I didn’t need to try them because I would not be successful. I would learn to spot the tricks and admire those that were stronger, bendier, more confident, etc. but that surely the move was not for me. Thank goodness for the incredibly encouraging community of which I am a part. Over the years, they have all continue to offer support – physically and emotionally to keep trying. Sometimes they have provided tough love, sometimes gentle persuasion, and sometimes sneaky pushes forward that I did not recognize. And it worked! There are still moves, tricks, and transitions that are out of my wheelhouse, after all I am still human, but now I am so much more willing to TRY. When something new pops up, I don’t automatically tell myself “I’ll never be able to do that” or “She’s so much more _____________ than I am.” Instead I try to shush that Negative Nancy inside my brain and give it a go. Maybe I don’t get all the way into the move, maybe I need a heavier spot than someone else, maybe I try and partway through decide “nope” and bail. All of that is ok. Because by being open to trying, I’m setting the groundwork for getting there. And when that trick comes up again days, weeks, or even years later, I’ve found myself trying and many times succeeding! And if still don’t succeed, I remind myself of the yet. Try again and see what happens next time. Because even if you don’t see the day-to-day changes, telling yourself you’re working on something, being patient with yourself, turning the phrase “I can’t” into something kinder can lead you to the surprisingly pleasant “I did.”
Why Aerial Dance
What I love most about Aerial Dance would have to be the feeling I get whenever I leave the studio. No matter how I feel when I walk in or what happened that week, just being in a room full of supportive women and compassionate, positive instructors changes the way I feel about myself and my attitude for the better. Whatever I felt before class melts away and I become more confident, happier, and I feel strong enough to overcome anything. Finding Pole Fitness was one of the major blessings in my life, it allows me to connect with myself and others in a deep, meaningful way. Even though we are individuals, it feels more like a team. When one of us struggles we come together to lift her up, never leaving anyone behind. I’ve tried so many fitness programs, but none were successful long term. I struggle with Rheumatoid Arthritis, so I usually pay for any type of exercise with being laid up in bed in pain. Aerial Dance is the one thing I’ve found that I leave feeling stronger and better than before I started. Strengthening myself and just being up and moving has helped my health and disorder incredibly, reducing my pain levels immeasurably. I also suffer from mental illness, where some days just leaving the house is a struggle. Every other fitness program I’ve tried eventually ends due to the lack of motivation and avoidance I feel about exercising. Aerial Dance is the one program I look forward to and actually miss when I cannot attend. I’ve never stuck with something so long and have no plans to stop any time soon. One thing I’m most proud of recently would have to be inverting for the first time back from the COVID break. Before the break I had to take time off due to injuries and illness. So with barely getting my strength back from that, the studio had to close down. Adding the months I was unable to work on my strength and endurance from the closure, I was terrified to go upside down. I just don’t feel strong enough and the trust I used to feel in myself is gone, but slowly returning. With the help of one of the amazing instructors that saw through my fear, she was able to show me a way to do a specific invert without it feeling scary. Showing me that I will get there again, I am not a lost cause, and in my own time I will be confident in myself and my abilities again. Every single instructor at Aerial Dance is amazing, selfless, and empathetic. If nothing else, they are what make this amazing studio everything that it is. A safe haven for women to be themselves.
Mirror Mirror – Why Don’t You Come With a Filter?!?
It’s time for a very common question we get asked every day: how are you doing? “I’m fine thanks. How are you?” you say immediately back, and you’re already walking away in your head. It’s an old joke at this point; the fact that we ask this question so often without actually wanting to know the answer, or even worse, actually answer it. What a loaded question it would be if we actually had to answer it in all it’s gory detail, and I highly doubt we’d ever ask it if it actually required an honest answer. And the answer would possibly change from month to month, day to day, hell, moment to moment! I’ve had my day absolutely obliterated in mere seconds and I doubt I’m the only one. So, how ARE you doing anyways? I know that for me, how I am doing is directly correlated to how I FEEL I am doing. I live in the moment, like a hamster. I do not consider myself as a whole. I do not care about my past accomplishments and I definitely don’t care how far I’ve come. Other people can try to cheer me on, giving me compliments and praise, but they are fools. Trapped between delusions and false flatteries. I’m busy beating myself up over here, and frankly, they’re killing my vibe. I’m the first person to admit that this is a flaw, because being humble and being a downer are two very different things. If you can see beauty in others, you can see beauty in yourself, and don’t try to act otherwise. Now, I’m going to make this completely clear: everyone, EVERYONE has the right to to be open with their emotions and struggles. This is what our sisterhoods are for, to lift each other up. We must treat others how we would want to be treated ourselves, and just as we would not want our loved ones to withhold our opportunities to lift them up during their low times, we should not deprive them of the opportunity to do the same for us. However, I’m personally responsible for my own weaknesses and I have to be careful not to burden others with them. Every negative remark I make about myself is an affront to someone my friends care about (ME) and they have no choice but to rectify the situation, which could be fatiguing for them over time. So, I stifle my bad thoughts about myself. Because frankly, they don’t often deserve to be said out loud, and they don’t contribute to my conversations. I’ve made such a habit of biting my forked tongue that sometimes I forget to realize the thoughts are the problem, not the expulsion of them. Our recent photo shoot (thanks Brittyni!) made me more aware of my nasty habit with a familiar instigator: kind words from another person. The lovely Sara commented a nice thing on a photo of mine in the instructor group page. Facebook alerted me, and honestly, I was surprised at the photo she chose to comment on. It was a photo that had curled my lip in disgust when I glanced at it the night before. Nonplussed, I commented back that she picked a weird photo to take a liking to, as I just looked rather fat and bored. Now, I wasn’t saying this in a *crying emoji* “omg I’m so fat” *mortified emoji* tone. It really felt to me like I was telling her the sky was blue, the grass was green , and you shouldn’t eat yellow snow. Now naturally (Big cliche incoming. Brace for impact.), we all can be our own worst critics. But sometimes, I swear I’m looking at a pile of old pizza boxes and my friends are saying it looks like a bistro in Sicily, so I don’t even know where they’re coming from anymore. And instead of realizing I’M the unreliable narrator, I choose to think they’re full of it. Now, having problems with your self image isn’t new, and it’s perfectly understandable. We are all bombarded with fake perfection everyday, and I would like to think I’m smart enough not to fall for it, but I don’t think I always am. I will also say, on a side note, that I CANNOT get over how amazing our students are. I’ve seen so many girls share an entire ALBUM of photos of themselves with nothing but satisfaction and pride. I could not do that. I would rather roll down Trash Mountain teeth first than just share photos of myself that I didn’t triple check for any Unforgivable Flaws. And the reason you girls can do that is because you see the photos for what they are: a moment in time, capturing yourself doing something awesome. Cellulite be damned. Didn’t notice it anyways, on account of all the flying around doing awesome shit in amazing lighting. All of you ladies are stronger than I am, in more ways than you know! Remember, negative self-talk doesn’t stop at appearances. It can creep into how you view your abilities, your accomplishments, and your potential. I know this all too well. Please, PLEASE be mindful of when you’re crossing the line of realism into self abuse. After all, we would most likely never speak to a friend the way we speak to ourselves. Do any of you out there feel like you struggle with negative self talk? Do you get hyper-focused on the negative? Ask yourselves, how ARE you doing? Because feeling bad about yourself isn’t admirable. I feel like when I am having a bad time with my self image, it can make me more vain and self obsessed than when I feel good about myself, which is frankly ironic. We were always taught by society to put ourselves down, because being vain is unattractive. How stupid is that?? How much can beat yourself up until you loop around into being vain again? This whole “She Don’t Know She’s Beautiful!” BS
The Good and the Bad
I love Aerial Dance and the community of amazing women that they support. Unfortunately there always seems to be people that don’t understand what it’s all about. When I first started at Aerial Dance I was ashamed to tell people what I was doing. I was afraid to admit that I danced on a pole for fitness. Unfortunately, that meant I didn’t take a lot of pictures. Eventually I was brave enough to take some and post them, and I was surprised at the positive response I got! People are often so amazed by moves that we often think are easy! I even recently had someone compare me to Pink! Sadly there is also a negative side to people’s reaction. When I first started pole I dealt with my best friend joking about me “training to be a stripper.” This past year I actually had to report someone at work for making the workplace super uncomfortable for me. He had seen a picture on my Facebook and had assumed that meant he could ask me some rather inappropriate questions. Some people also seem to instantly try to degrade you for being in your shorty shorts and sports bra on a pole, but they don’t understand the reason for it. I truly believe that if most of the people who are very anti-pole would try it they would realize that they like it! I can only hope that it becomes more and more acceptable in the years to come! Just remember for everyone out there who may try to put you down for doing what you love, there is someone watching what you are doing and thinking that it’s amazing and beautiful!
It’s Showtime!
It’s that magical time of year again – preparing for THE ANNUAL SHOW!!! I love this time of year, I get so excited to see everyone’s creativity come alive. With all of the changes this year, I am so excited that this is still a constant for us. I will be performing in multiple numbers as usual, but they will definitely be different. In order to prepare, I started early in the summer. For me, preparation begins with picking a song. I like to mix it up and challenge myself to try different genres of music. I have taken this route again this year – trying a new style that I haven’t done before. I’m also going out of my comfort zone and trying a different apparatus! Once I have my song, I listen to it over and over, starting to visualize different poses, where transitions should be versus where good holds would be. I spend time just listening and playing before I commit to any moves. Over time, as I play with different things, certain moves and transitions start to feel natural at spots in the song. As the routine starts to take shape I make sure that I write down parts that I for sure like. Combinations that flow nicely, areas of the song that I know I want certain moves, etc get written down to cement their positions within the routine. I fill in the blanks and fix any gaps in the routine. Once established, I need to run it. Over and over and over – especially in my mind. I do a lot of visualization which helps me to remember what comes next without quite so much wear and tear on my body. We all know that you can only practice and do a routine full out so many times in a day. In your mind you can do it as many times as you like! As the show continues to get closer, I make sure that I am allowing myself enough physical rest. I know that my body needs time to recover when I’m doing a full routine. I also like to make sure that I’m leaving time to do some special things for myself to relax, like scheduling a massage. With so much going on and seeing everyone working, I’m so excited to be going through this process again and look forward to seeing what everyone creates!
Moving up, and working hard!
Oh wow! I was so excited when I moved up to intermediate pole, knowing that I was going to be trying even more new and challenging things. Going from beginner to intermediate pole is exciting and challenging! We do a lot of conditioning to make sure that we can be strong enough to handle the tricks our instructors show us safely and I am grateful for it! At first I thought maybe I was not ready to take the next step from one level to another, but after taking class I realized I was exactly where I needed to be. I want to be challenged and I want to be safe while building strength and stamina on the pole. I am excited to some day go into advanced class but for now I am so happy to have this community where I can work on my skills. My advice for anyone going from beginner to intermediate would be to listen to your teachers!! They are there to guide you and they will let you know when you are ready, and everyone goes at their own pace, so don’t be scared and enjoy that you made progress!
