The last few weeks have brought about a lot of changes for me. Sometimes my anxiety is through the roof and I have to remember how far I’ve come in the last few weeks. I’ve experienced a wide array of emotions including anxiety, depression, anger, and sadness.I keep thinking about the past and what I could have done to change things. I also keep thinking about the future and scared of what will happen.
I’ve gotten to the point that I can only accept what has happened and learn from it and grow. I have to chalk it up as a learning experience that has taught me to be humble and thankful for what I have. It is so easy to dwell on what happened and what I have lost instead of looking to the future.
I’ve learned to take a step back and be thankful and practice gratitude. I learned to appreciate what I have. I learned to breath. Supportive family and friends who have been there for me and believe I will get through this. I have a roof over my head, a car to drive, and food in my fridge.
The Merriam-Webster dictionary expresses gratitude the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. I had a great kindness shown to me that I don’t know how I will ever repay.
As I mentioned in my previous blog, two weeks ago, I lost my job, and it was completely unexpected. I was performing well and in the last year or so, I kept my head down, did what I was told and tried to keep to myself a bit more. I went home in a panic and sat down and wrote down all of my bills and expenses and tried to figure out how I could make ends meet and if I would lose my house. I contacted the studio and asked if I could put a hold on my membership for a few months because I wasn’t sure how I was going to pay my bills.
I was upset thinking about not being able to go to the studio. Especially at a time like this, I needed it more than ever. Going to the studio instantly puts me in a better mood and I feel so happy after I leave. I am also developing strength and doing things I didn’t think possible. I have so much fun will all of the students and getting to know new people. I also appreciate all of the instructors and their fun helpful personalities. I needed to be able to continue doing this for my own personal health and well being.
I was encouraged to apply for the sister scholarship program so that I could continue going to the studio. I am thankful that I have had this opportunity while I am trying to get back on my feet.
I want all of the instructors and students to know how much I appreciate you making me laugh and forget for an hour or two what I have going on in my life. I know eventually the right opportunity will come along and I will land on my feet. I have my friends, family, and my studio family to thank for that.
Your extremely grateful aerial sister..