I became self-conscious of my body as early as fourth grade. By middle and high school, those insecurities grew louder. Even though I was petite, I felt pressure to stay “skinny.” Growing up during the Tumblr and early Instagram era didn’t help. The “thigh gap” trend made me hyper-aware. I picked up habits like covering my stomach in photos, constantly adjusting and hiding.  Looking back, it’s heartbreaking to realize how young I was, already convinced my body wasn’t good enough. But what even is “ideal”? The standard always shifts. Today, I’m grateful for my body. She’s strong and carries me through so much.

Healing has been a process, and the shift came in an unexpected place: pole dancing. What began as a class became transformative. On the pole, I wasn’t focused on how I looked but on what my body could do. I noticed strength I hadn’t recognized and control I never imagined. Curiosity replaced criticism. Feeling grounded and powerful mattered more than being “thin” or “perfect.” Pole became my outlet, my happy place, my way of expressing emotions I couldn’t always put into words. It helped me appreciate the parts I once hid. Even small things (like my “monkey toes” from warm-ups) became reminders of my body’s adaptability.

Confidence for me now is about feeling strong and sexy on my own terms. That doesn’t mean body image is always easy. I still have tough days, but I remind myself that our bodies are meant to change—especially as women. We fluctuate with cycles, stress, and life. That’s normal. Even my awkward “upside-down pole faces” remind me of something powerful. They mean I’m hanging upside-down on a pole, doing something incredible.

If you’ve struggled with how you see your body, you’re not alone. Body dysmorphia isn’t always obvious. Sometimes it shows up in the quiet moments like when you’ve changed outfits over and over or cropped a photo before posting. It’s real, and it’s valid.

Healing is possible. For me, it came through movement, strength, and seeing my body as more than appearance but as a source of power. I’m still on the journey, but I’m proud of how far I’ve come. Your body is more than something to be judged. It’s something to be lived in, moved in, expressed through, and loved.